Hindsight is 2020

Good Day and Happy New Year.

2019 was a year that I am honored to put in the pages of the past. So many things happened good and bad, it was really bittersweet. It hit me like a fist to the heart this morning how much I miss the days of "auld lang syne," with my family, old friends, life in general. In certain moments I get clear visions, one like the one that just came to me, that my brothers and I would laugh TOGETHER, cry TOGETHER, bend over backwards to help each OTHER, care less about the subconscious past hurt from another brother that so easily lingers on and on, like a cancer, and grows, that these old feelings would die out and be replaced with a heart of LOVE (patience, kindness, not envious, not boastful, not dishonoring, not self-seeking, not easily angered, keeping no record of wrongs and all the rest that those verses so clearly state.) How much higher each one of us would fly, how much further each of us would go, how much more beautiful life would be. Tears break through my own calloused heart, smothering it, soothing it, bringing it to life again with just the thought of what could be. I already don't like what I have wrote. It does not come out the way I feel it and see it. Oh well, I will keep writing and maybe my thoughts will more accurately show up on the page. I am rusty. My last blog was over 5 years ago. This is my first blog in Kentucky and I have lived here for nearly five years. Let's talk about that for a while... Kentucky began on a trip north to see a beautiful farmhouse near Danville, Kentucky where Jack, Amy and I trekked from our home in Atlanta to see what could be, where we could go, but not quite where we are. We did not end up there, we ended up in a small white ranch in the city of Lexington. This was after living in three different other locations around Lexington during a five month period between May and October 2015. Not ideal, but it got us through that time. To put it clearly, Kentucky has not been a "lucky" place if I add up all the challenges we have had to overcome here. Seems like it has been one after another for the entirety of our life here... and yet... we feel at home here. We have met more kind hearted people in this place than probably anywhere that I have lived in my life in total. The trade has been worth it. We are hoping very much that the challenges subside, but in reality, as the old adage says "life is full of challenges," so I won't hold my breath. I will just continue to prepare for them, plodding hard into the future in good faith that the beauty of that farmhouse in Danville and so much more will come to us someday... and yet... if it doesn't that will be quite ok. It will be what it will be. I think of that old Bruce Lee quote, "Do not pray for an easy life, pray for the strength to endure a difficult one." Or maybe the song I put on a past blog in the memorable year of 2007 from Martina McBride, "You can spend your life building something from nothing. One storm can come and blow it all away. Build it anyway." Which leads me to this year.

2020 I would like to listen closer to those trying to help me, correct me when I am wrong, constructively criticize me, put me up, tell me when I have done something good, whether it be bad or good, if it is truthful, that I am ready to take it. I would like to be a better husband to my wife, one that she can truly say she is proud to know and come home to, one she is excited to be with. One that can carry her through tough times, love her and help her and be there for her when she needs it most (cliche I know, but the point remains the same.) I feel like I have been a little bit clueless over the past seven or so years, picking up little clues along the way. Confidence rides like a roller coaster in this category. If I ever wished she loved me then I must love her first, no matter how dry the climate, how hardened the relationship gets... it is the only way I know to find a way back to true love. I must give... and give... and when I think I have given enough... keep on giving. Boy do I struggle with this. One day, one hour, one minute, one moment at a time. On the bright side, no surprise it is that Mann Solar is growing, becoming something that really can help those in search of a way to find electrical independence, a great, steady investment, those ready to purchase their electricity from the Sun rather that rent it from the power company. It is no surprise because I have used 80% of my good waking hours working on it, planting seeds, building it, tending to it, something I could be doing more of in any of the above paragraphs. I hope soon I will be able to take percentages of this away from this and share them on the above, but as anyone who has built a business knows, it must first be able to stand on its own two feet without me. That day has not come yet. Maybe in 2020... that is the plan. Yet I always must remember, it was my choice to do this... and I do. I understand this. It is a decision I have made and become quite ok with. It is an inlet and an outlet as it is something I believe in... The tennis has continued and the bagpiping as well. I cherish these outlets. They have put me in front of some wonderful people whom I have been fortunate to build relationships and friendships with, they have given me the fulfillment of knowing that I don't live this life only to help me and mine, but to in some micro way pursuade the world around me to be a little bit sweeter, better every time I head out to the tennis court or head off to play another pipe gig. On the selfish side, the piping has given me a chance to travel the country roads of Kentucky, Georgia, and North Carolina (respectively, looking back) which is something I love. To play music on the car radio and use that time to regain my own perspective in some small way, to realign myself onto a path more accurately walking with God. My pipe band, Kentucky United Pipes and Drums, a beautiful family in and of itself that I am lucky enough to be a part of, has given me the chance to become its President, a role I have very much to grow into. Entering my second year in this position, I hope to help this band make real headway in what seems to be its three main goals: Grow the band, win competitions, and increase our performances. On the tennis side another super-fine family exists at the Lexington Tennis Club Ever since that first day sitting in Jo's office and Don Carbone walked in and gave it to me straight, saying; "Look, we're not gonna give up on you as long as you don't give up on us." I knew then that this was the place for me to work. Ever since, I have had the pleasure of meeting and working with the best work family I could ever ask for. These people are gold. I am blessed. Through every hiccup and every rough road I hit on my last 4 1/2 years of life in Kentucky, they rode it out with me, only to tell me in person at the end of each year that they appreciate me so much. The words Don spoke from the beginning have held so true. This truth is the firm backbone that the relationship I have with LTC is dependent on. Lucky me, lucky me. Looks like it's time for Amy, Freckles and I to go and enjoy this New Year's Day at the Red River Gorge. One thing I have been telling myself is that I would start writing again, even if it comes out rough, I imagine it will smooth out in time, and even if it doesn't I'll just keep on writing... because. Hope you all have the greatest year in 2020, and may your foresight be 2020. Signing off, ~ TennisPiper

Love... it's where it's at.

 
What I have worked for has mostly come to pass.  I wanted a life love... I worked hard to prepare for it, and I got it in a spectacular way upon meeting the love of my life, Amy Ayers on August 20th 2012, when I received a little friend request on facebook.  I wrote a quick note, she wrote a quick note back, and a bunch of notes later I was booking a flight up to visit her in my roots of central Ohio, as we went to high school together back in 97-01.  From there one of us visited the other at least once a month between that time until after our marriage on October 25th, 2013 to when Amy moved down to live with me once and for all on January 2nd, 2014.  That is the story of us in a nutshell, maybe I will elaborate more on it later.  Just know that, come our wedding day... we danced and danced and danced.  Below are the few first facebook messages that we wrote, copied in... don't think Amy will care (I kept them all):
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·  Nathan Dawes Mann

Hey Amy, long time. Good to see you here on facebook. How's your life going?
~ Nathan

·  August 20, 2012

· 

8:52pm

Amy Ayers

Hey Nate! its been quite a bit of time..bit i refuse to grow old! thats for sissies. i cant complain about my life. how about yours?

· 

11:37pm

Nathan Dawes Mann

amen to that! "Some grow young, some grow cold." Good to hear your life is well... looks like you have a baby boy now? He's cute!!!
As for my life, it is great. I currently own a home down here in Atlanta, Georgia and teach tennis and play the bagpipes for a living. I also have a German Shepherd named Jack that keeps me good company, along with the four roommates that pay all my bills... plus It's great because 3 of 4 are rarely ever here, so it works out very well. What else, I own a 35-foot veggie-fueled school bus rv conversion that I sometimes live in and am planning to take to Alaska for three months next summer... I'll be playing pipe gigs all along the way at Irish pubs for their waste veggie oil, tips, and a meal... gonna be fun.
That's my current story in a nutshell... you?
~ Nathan

·  August 21, 2012

· 

7:03pm

Amy Ayers

word! i like that quote. with your permission i will post this all over the place and use it repeatedly in my daily life no babies for me yet, i have two nephews and that is the newest one. i havent met the right man yet and sometimes .......you sound like such an intriguing person and your life is more interesting then mine! i love to watch tennis!!! and i love german shepards i currently live by myself in an apartment in hilliard, love living alone for the first time since march. i work as a treatment plan coordinator at a dental office in dublin, however id really like to go to grad school. but who knows...im pretty happy with life.. cant complain...if you ever make it back to ohio ive got alot of veggie oil and would love to take a ride in the veggie fueled wagon
p.s. roger federer is my idol
~ Amy

·  August 23, 2012

· 

12:20am

Nathan Dawes Mann

haha of course you can. So that baby isn't yours? And you're single? Wow, I woulda never thought that in a million years back in high school... from what I remember you were the big catch. All the guys talked about you and I could see why So, you love tennis and german shepherds... jeez! Do you like the bagpipes too? So what does a treatment plan coordinator do? Coordinate treatment plans? I might need my wisdom teeth taken out soon... haha
Yes, I would love to take you for a ride in my bus whenever it goes that way...

12:31am

 


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Fast forward to now, August 28th 2014.  Amy has just arrived in central Ohio on a flight to see her family for Labor Day weekend.  I had to work so I stayed back.

I sit here comfortably at my posh desk (got it for free, but that doesn't change the point) in my office with my Bose stereo (paid only $50 for it) playing Irish music while a washer washes my clothes in the other room and I sit with a glass of wine at my side, my (free) German Shepherd panting beside me with a ceiling fan to give me a nice breeze on the back of my neck as I sit in a big black high back rolling, swiveling desk chair (free too) with a nice desk lamp lighting a picture of my two grand-dads standing arm in arm as good friends would.  All is well, so well.  And herein lies my point.  I used to write once a week, then it turned into once a month, then once a year, now once every two years... and why?   Not sure exactly, as I have thought about it hundreds of times, but it seems to have gone directly in conjunction with the "improvement" in my quality of life.  If I was poor in 2007 I am filthy rich now, maybe not to a millionaire, but in my own mind at least.  Then again, a millionaire is not rich to a billionaire and so on and so forth, but to me, I am filthy rich.  In essence, I have all I need and much more.  Oops, I just got a text I had to respond to, just had to.  Therein lies the "much more", maybe too much?  Aahhh, the balance is so hard to achieve. 

Yes, you might say that it is because I am busy and that is a good thing.  Well then I must ask why?  At what point am I too busy?  At what point do I have enough wealth set aside to relax a little bit and take up what I would really love to do, to give back, to do the little things that I never had/made time for before... to get my sanity back?  Well then you have the other end of the stick where it just looks like laziness and lack of motivation.   Aahhh, the balance is so hard to achieve.

I have so many things.  I have obtained all kinds of cool items over the years, some small (ie pictures), some large (um, veggie bus.)  At what point do I decide to give things away or sell them?  What might I need in the future and what might I not?  I hear some say to get rid of as much as you can while others say it is good to double up on some possibly important items in a time of need and that it is better to have too much than too little.  Ugghh, the balance is so hard to achieve.

I do so many things.  I am a successful teacher/player of tennis and the bagpipes.  I love working on projects, like my veggie bus.  I love to (and frequently do) travel all over.  I have many friends I like to spend time with.  Now I have a wonderful wife that occupies my evenings and weekends whenever we get the chance to spend time together.  I like to exercise and stay in shape so often times I am doing a workout program.  I had two meetup groups that were successful in their own right, but I had to let them go.  They were just too much... occupied too much of my time.  And therein lies the point.  At what point is it too much?!  Daahhh, the balance is so hard to achieve.

Then there is that still small voice.  You all know, the one that gives me all the wisdom in life, if I would just listen.  Well, in all the noise of this hectic life, I don't take enough time to listen... and even if I did, would I be able to hear?  Sometimes I do, but do I have the time to write it down, to take note?  I tell you what, back then I did.  In 2007 when I had very little I did.

And herein lies the SOLUTION.  I must get rid of all things in my life that could possibly take away from me taking the time to listen to that still small voice.  I must also get rid of all the things that would keep me from hearing it in the first place.  This is where I currently stand... at the crossroads... with the kitchen sink on my back and a long road ahead...

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What I have learned so far is this, I need to LOVE... better... more... etc.  You know I have very much enjoyed reading my bible throughout the years... most of the time, but I think the main reason why I don't like to quote it very often is not so much that I don't know or love it like other books that I take quotes from, it is that I don't do what it says!  I simply fail so many times to even come close to the ultimate beauty that I read about in the bible.  I would be a big fat hypocrite to quote it, unless of course I put the preceding lines in fine print.  And herein I may be hitting a nail on the head... in the dark.  Maybe that is why many of us don't like to read/quote it.  We find it's light all too bright in the dimness that can sometimes be our life.  We find the guilt it might possibly create would be too large for ourselves to handle.  I may only be speaking for myself here, but either way, it is a point I am going to make.  Maybe I/we like to keep my/our life(s) so busy that we don't have time to hear that still small voice, because it might just tell us something we don't want to hear... at least that is what we, in our darkness, may believe.  I will stop speaking for others now, but myself only, because for me, this is the truth. 

In my own life I have found myself saying and doing things that I never could have foreseen myself doing even five years ago.  I do forgive myself for these things, but I have to ask myself where they come from, and most importantly, how do I kill them so they don't come back in my future.  I have come to the conclusion that they are a darkness in me that I have let creep up, mainly because of hushing that voice inside of me that sheds light into all darkness.  With that light and only with that can I kill that junk that pops up in my own darkness.  Light dispels darkness.

Easier said than done.


Signing off,

~ Nathan

...

Preparation 2012

 (written early morning Sunday, May 13th)
Here goes:  the vision of what is ahead continues to be what is worked on daily.  I am in the midst of the mechanical nuts and bolts of putting God's pieces of my life together toward an ever-more-gratifying something in the distance.  2012 is and has been a year of preparation.  I am preparing for what I can and leaving the rest in God's hands, but I plan to take a big trip to Alaska in my veggie bus the coming Spring 2013.  It will be a two month or so adventure over some rivers and through some woods and back.  The plan as it stands is to play bagpipe gigs at pubs and sell t-shirts, stickers, and whatever else I can sell along the way.  I will play at pubs that serve food, where I can pick up their waste vegetable oil (WVO) as payment for playing and the money I receive will be whatever they give me plus tips and sales.  This is really all there is to the travel plan so far.

As for the bus, I have it back up and running on WVO and this time it is on a switch inside the cabin on my instrument panel, as opposed to being a valve system inside the engine compartment, that besides it's faults, was also inconvenient.  I have found a goldmine of a veggie mechanic named Michael Tyler here in ATL that is helping me with all that my imagination (and wallet) can afford.  He is a genius when it comes to fuel systems, fun to work with, and very reasonable.  My next plan is to take out the whole tank and box as it sits now and replace it with a much more streamlined system that will run better, fit more veggie, and take up less space in the bus.  These plans were made after much discussion with Michael as to what the best system would be to get me safely to Alaska and back with minimal issues.  More on this later as it progresses...

Other plans pertaining to the bus include installing solar panels along the rooftop, which will hook into batteries under the couch which will charge and hook into a power inverter, which will in turn power everything I need in the school bus.  The secondary power will come from a diesel generator, which could be either under, behind or on top of the bus.  This will also be hooked into the veggie system, so it will run relatively free.  All this will give me a relatively free source of electricity, should I be without a power hookup for an extended period of time.
______________________________________

 

Link to meetup group HERE

Bus aside, I have been very busy with my Ron Paul Meetup Group, which I started on the early morning of April 7th, 2011.  We now have 159 members and have been very active in the delegate process of getting our candidate elected the next President.  For those who are adept in politics you know very well that in the Republican party it is all about gaining delegates to win the nomination.  Currently Ron Paul has won 11 states, due to grassroots efforts of groups like mine all over the United States.  So it is a very exciting and busy time in the Ron Paul R3VOJUTION and I am excited to see how the cards play out.  The weekend after this is our State convention, where we pick 34 delegates to the National Convention, where the big voting for our next candidate takes place.  The rest of our some 70 delegates in Georgia were elected at our District Conventions, of which I am in the 7th.

We have had many meetups since we began over a year ago, 49 to be exact, and we have many more scheduled for the next month.  I love this group and all that it does to further the cause of liberty in a nation so starved for it... little did I know I would ever be saying that in the once great U.S. of A.  Everything from our all-but-destroyed dollar to our reckless spending and corruption in government are a very far cry from the principles this Country was founded on and what made it great.  We are doing all we can to change the course of history and I hope all reading will consider supporting such a plan.  It is a widely known rumor that once you go Paul... you never go... back.  Why?  Well, I'll let you do the research on that if you haven't already.  But this isn't a political blog, so I will move on...
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Many plans for my future are pending this year's election results.  Part of the reason I will be taking the big trip next year is because I know I will need a break from it all.  I truly don't believe our country will last much longer as a free nation if it continues on the path it is on, so we will see...
________________________________________

On the homefront I have been doing a lot of projects, including:

• Concreted the dirt part of my basement, and building a retaining wall where all the dirt was taken out (see videos) Before / After
• Staining my house (in progress, see pics below)
• Carpeted the basement (pics below)
• Power outlet in carport for school bus (Danny's doing)
• Leveled and re-seeded the front and back yard
• Dug out where the bus is now located.  That dirt was used to level the back yard.  The front yard was leveled with dirt that came out of the basement (around 700 wheel barrows full)
• Retaining wall to hold the dirt back where the bus is located (Danny's doing - in bus video above)
• Garden built (joint effort, but Andrew built the retaining wall for it.)
• Re-floored Andrew's room (all Andrew)
• Installed a french drain system on northeast side of house

Smaller projects include:

• Clearing brush and unwanted groundcover (oh nice, one of my cardinals just came by for his breakfast at my feeder)
• Painting walls in basement
• Andrew has done a ton of small projects around here, like installing an attic fan, helping finish the attic foil insulation, painting trim and such, and just a ton of other things.
• then there are a bunch of other things I've done too.  Life is good!

Much is left to do, but I'm on the right track, and enjoying the journey...

at the start...

acquired a mercedes along the way...

Before - Basement Bedroom

After - Main Basement Area

After Basement Bedroom

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Other vehicle stories:  The grey bimmer, also known as the Millennium Falcon, has now long surpassed the 300k mile mark and is in repair mode to go another 100k.  I have been selling parts from the white bimmer and found a good mechanic along the way who is currently helping me with some major repairs.  He gets to pocket the money on the side from his normal mechanic job at the local BMW dealership and I get cheap repairs.  It's a win-win situation.  One big thing he just did was to replace my badly worn steering rack and pinion, an $800 part and $500 - $600 in labor, with a nearly new one from my white bimmer for only $200 bucks... my kinda deal.  He will soon be doing some more front end work, getting my ac back up and running (it hasn't run since year one, six years ago), fixing engine leaks, and the biggest thing will be putting in a new clutch soon.  I have also recently purchased a new top from eBay, so I will be installing that myself soon.  This is a full-day project for a novice like myself.  I had no idea how much goes into the install until I checked it out online.  Thank God for the Internet.  I was able to find step-by-step instructions in minutes!

What else, I have recently purchased a yellow 1977 Mercedes 300D (as in diesel :)) for $910 bucks (see pic with house above.)  I drove it home, but it has a list of things needed done on it as well.  This will be tackled once I get all my bimmer stuff taken care of... My goal is to turn it into a veggie-burner and possibly pull it on my trip to Alaska... we will see about that.  Much to come before that decision is made...
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On a personal note, I am doing well.  Jack is dreaming well, sleeping at my side while I sit at the kitchen table with a ball at his side, coffee at my side, my back yard and birds on the feeder seen through the window on my right, with my Mercedes-Benz in full view.  A DVD playing in the background, a Planxty concert.  A taste of that below...

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The sun is up, it is a new day.  I must be going now.  I will leave you with some thoughts I have come up with on facebook over the past few months:

February 23rd:  Don't focus so much on what you can't do that you don't see what you CAN do.
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March 25th:  So I was playing my bagpipes for a party last night and it was mostly military people. I asked one fellow who spent all of 2010 in Afghanistan what the one biggest reason was why they don't like us. The answer: "They don't want us over there occupying there land." Hmm... sounds very different from what our media is preaching, that it is because we are rich and free, but on the other hand, a lot like a what a certain presidential candidate has been saying... RP 2012!
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April 17th:  I am looking for a mate for Jack, my German Shepherd. He is about 4 1/2 years old, fit, very good with a frisbee and addicted to balls... tennis balls. He is a bit high strung and looking for a nice female German Shepherd to calm his nerves. The female must want babies, lots of babies, or Jack is simply not interested. If you are that special bitch, or you know of a compatible one, please respond back!
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April 30th:  Indirect Tom Petty Quote from the Concert Josh, Danny, and I attended on April 29th, 2012
 It was a beautiful day
The sun beat down
I put the peddle down... to make some time.
I'm running down a dream... but...
The waiting is the hardest part
You take it on faith... you take it to the heart
Yeah the waiting is the hardest part.

Tom Petty - ATL - 4/29/12 - forever in the memory bank
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May 6th:  Those who are greedy receive less in life than those who are not... and those who are impatient take longer to get to where they are going... Success in life is a beautiful irony.
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I'll end it with this:  Would you believe me if I told you that I own a house, an RV, a Mercedes, and two BMW's?  You better believe it... ;)



Signing off,

~ Nathan D. Mann

Be A Story

... through the highs and through the lows one must wonder where to go, but through it all we must never forget... we are here to be a story, and to be a part of a much bigger one...


Today I write with a fresh look on all the crazy hits that have come in these past few years, from parents re-marrying to brothers divorcing, to people struggling and the top man glowing, from being in love to being said goodbye, from standing up to the evil that exists to falling on my knees begging God for forgiveness for my sins, to all the folk who come and go, to the politicians who lie while the statesmen stand for truth, it has been a time of trial... a time to produce my story.

______________________

You know it is funny I just took a look at my last blog to see when I last wrote... one year ago tomorrow. Destiny would have it that I would open my digital journal and write at this particular moment in time. But rather than go into detail of all that has occurred over this past year, I would rather delve into the place I have come to now, and the stories that light my fire.

My writing abilities have probably deteriorated a bit from this long hiatus, but bear with me while I attempt to bring them back.

__________

This country is in a very prime place right now... prime for making REAL changes, prime for growing, prime for listening to our hearts once again, prime for learning humility again, prime for re-awakening the dreams that exist in our hearts.

For the sake of not wasting your time, let me just say this. I am on my way up. On my way up with God, man, work, and all that I am capable of doing for others. My dreams are alive and well, and God is at the helm. I pray He keeps this crazy horse on course, because it will inevitably be a wild road ahead.

____________

Let me just tell you about a little experience I had the other day that I would like to call "Sessions with 'The Man'."

To preface, let me tell you that I have recently begun working for a unique financial services brokerage firm with a huge vision. (Don't worry, I still teach/play tennis & the bagpipes and hopefully will continue for years and years to come.) I have already become licensed in Life Insurance & Annuities and I sit down with people and help them get into a feasible financial plan to improve their future without the downside risk that stocks, 401(k)'s, 403(b)'s, and Mutual Funds come with. Let's just say, the right products for the times, and the right vehicle to help. The company is called People Helping People, or PHP. It has been around for only 2 years and has grown to over 5,000 Associates and is playing big time offense in this downtrodden economy. I am sure you will be hearing about them from more than just me over the coming years...

At the helm of this company, sits a 6 foot 5 inch Iranian Christian man named Patrick Bet-David, who immigrated here as a child during the first Iraq War. You can read his story here. I read his story, read his blogs, his vision, etc. I think they are great. I have met him before, but this past Thursday I got to really spend quality time with 'the man.' He was coming into Atlanta to do a Corporate Overview for the Atlanta Headquarters. We first had a meeting at 2-4pm with licensed associates only. He frequently mentioned me during the meeting as a hopeful leader to emerge within our company. I knew this beforehand, as they see my ability to work with people and my drive to become a success. But I wasn't really interested in this, as much as where my 'leader' was in mind and soul, in particular. We all sat there and listened to a man very well versed with his tongue, but through all the great stories and thoughts on his beliefs, I wanted to come up with a question for him that he was not used to hearing. I didn't want to stump the man, I just wanted to hear him answer a simple, but also tough question that was outside of his comfort zone.

The question was this: "What is the number one quality of a leader?"

He immediately spun the question around and asked me what I thought it was. Though I knew my answer, I refused to say it, as I wanted to hear his answer. I could tell he was a bit bothered just by the fact that I was not going to tell him my opinion. So, stuck there, he went on to answer the question, stating many many good qualities of a leader, but he could not say one to be the greatest, nor could he say the one thing that I believe it is. It wasn't until later on after our Corporate Overview meeting that I had the pleasure to sit right in front of him where we all met again for dinner at Chili's. Yes, I sat down right in front of him, so that I could look him in the eye and get a true feel for his presence and what it really is he stands for. I heard him speak about some great things in one sentence, but then in another sentence about expensive purses for his wife and a huge mall in Houston. I knew at that point that he is struggling with the same things that every wealthy American is faced with... greed. This is not to say he is full of it... it is just an inevitable struggle of being in his position. It was at this point that I was asked what my answer to the question I had asked earlier was, to which I responded: "A servant to the many."

Tick tock, tick tock, I knew this answer would certainly bring the conversation to another level... and... it did. Patrick is a very strong stature character who usually is able to wield himself by his amount of wisdom plus the above, but I knew for this time, he felt threatened. I could sense it. I wished he would simply say, "Good answer Nathan", but I knew he wouldn't go down without another challenge. So, I asked him another question. It was this: "Since this company is very much about obtaining leaders, what is it that you want to use these leaders for? In other words, why should leaders work for PHP?" Immediately he stormed back with the comment, "Why are you working here?" To which I responded, first off to help people, secondly to pay for certain things and get into a better financial situation (or get out of my 'shituation' so that I can help other people with theirs'... haha just kidding), but also, to learn more about the financial services industry. So, we sparred back and forth with each other while everyone listened in. What the reason for my questions came down to was this... Is this company reeeaaaalllly what it claims to be, or is the talk a front for a means to an end? Afterward I came to the conclusion that this company, along with every profitable organization, struggles with the balance, the balance of making money and following your vision. Yet this company has such a better vision than any other company I have found in recent history, that naturally, I must hold them to a higher standard. Gosh, this sounds a lot like me! Yet, I know in my heart of hearts that there is such a thing as a fine line that we can walk to fulfill both. I am constantly striving to stay on (and sometimes find) that line.

One word keeps us on it... and that is prayer.

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After the great sparring session at Chili's, Bo, our head of Atlanta Operations and all of the east coast as well as CMO of the company, convinced Patrick that he needed to check out the famous Veggie Bus at my home, so he did. We all trucked over and hung out for a bit while showing him the famous veggie bus. Here is a little video Patrick made from that experience... I hope you don't hold it against him... or any of us!



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You see I have so many incredible stories and I am sure you do to, but I haven't hit the road in such a while. How badly I would love to get the veggie bus ready for a road trip you do not even know. I just need to focus on my PHP business and hopefully I can help many of you through this company while you in turn help me to hit the road... where many stories await... If you are curious and would like more information as to what I do, please write back and I will be more than happy to tell you!

What else is going on right now? I am working out early mornings with Bo, our CMO, who has also become a good friend and mentor. Lots of other stuff going on, but maybe we'll just have to catch up in conversation. But boy, how I would love to hit the road...

In the meantime, I plan to continue building on my story... I hope you build yours too...

Hope continues... faith envisions... and love thrives. I miss you all and hope to see you soon...


God bless you big time. I am signing off...


~ Nate


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Lyrics:

Josh Garrels - Farther Along

Farther along we’ll know all about it
Farther along we’ll understand why
Cheer up my brothers, live in the sunshine
We’ll understand this, all by and by

Tempted and tried, I wondered why
The good man died, the bad man thrives
And Jesus cries because he loves em’ both
We’re all cast-aways in need of ropes
Hangin’ on by the last threads of our hope
In a house of mirrors full of smoke
Confusing illusions I’ve seen

Where did I go wrong, I sang along
To every chorus of the song
That the devil wrote like a piper at the gates
Leading mice and men down to their fates
But some will courageously escape
The seductive voice with a heart of faith
While walkin’ that line back home

So much more to life than we’ve been told
It’s full of beauty that will unfold
And shine like you struck gold my wayward son
That deadweight burden weighs a ton
Go down into the river and let it run
And wash away all the things you’ve done
Forgiveness alright

Chorus

Still I get hard pressed on every side
Between the rock and a compromise
Like the truth and pack of lies fightin’ for my soul
And I’ve got no place left go
Cause I got changed by what I’ve been shown
More glory than the world has known
Keeps me ramblin’ on

Skipping like a calf loosed from its stall
I’m free to love once and for all
And even when I fall I’ll get back up
For the joy that overflows my cup
Heaven filled me with more than enough
Broke down my levee and my bluff
Let the flood wash me

And one day when the sky rolls back on us
Some rejoice and the others fuss
Cause every knee must bow and tongue confess
That the son of god is forever blessed
His is the kingdom, we’re the guests
So put your voice up to the test
Sing Lord, come soon

Chorus

Land of the Secure... and the Home of the Wimps?!

It hit me hard while doing some hill sprints yesterday that America is becoming the 'Land of the Secure and the Home of the Wimps!' I was just contemplating on the fact that America was originally supposed to be the "Land of the Free and the Home of the Brave." This means that people who are brave and like freedom live in and will love this country. If someone does not want to be brave, but instead prefers a sedentary, easy, and secure lifestyle where things are taken care of for him, then there are plenty of other places in the world where he would be very happy... or maybe not... enough doers to cover his costs and make him happy? I have to be blunt here. I have been really irritated with Americans as of late. It seems too many people are asking what can be done for them and why things aren't so great for them... as if they are entitled to this stuff! The more I talked with people from all over the country I noticed two very different types of people: Those who do... and are irritated, and those who look to receive... and are also irritated.

These two types of people seem to be in the biggest battle I have witnessed of my life so far. The doers are constantly irritated with the receivers for sucking the life out of this country. The receivers are irritated with the doers because they are doing everything they can to keep the receivers from getting it so easy. Clearly a country cannot survive with two such different thinkers... or maybe it can. Maybe that is the only way that the receivers can survive. Maybe that is the only way for the doers to remain humble from their work. But... how humble are these doers going to be forced to become? Do you think they are going to keep wanting to do while the receivers keep on taking more and more from them? I don't think so. Something has got to give.

Clearly, I classify myself (and I don't like to put myself into any class) as a doer. Yes, I could do more. I believe we all could. But the main thing that differentiates me from a receiver is what I ask of myself the minute I wake up in the morning... that is, "what can I do to work towards my goals?" While a receiver asks, "What can I get to come closer to my goals?"

So as this country becomes more and more of a receiver country, it becomes more and more of a failure country. I meet people everywhere... even a lot of doers... that just annoy me. They do, but then they start complaining too early and don't ask enough of themselves. They have no faith. They are falling... falling... falling... slowly but surely into that receiver category as they ask less and less of themselves, and more and more of others. These are the people that I am targeting this blog toward. These are the people that, with a simple change of thought back to the way they used to think (if they can just remember how that was!) could start back on the real doer road again. These people are still effected by what I write, or by an inspirational quote, or by a Rocky movie, or by a great speaker that begs in a flashy way for people to give life their best! These people need to snap out of it.

How? One might ask. Simple, just ask yourself, what is the most I can give today. If that means quitting a job that is sucking the time and life out of you and going with a dream you had when you were a kid then do it! Jeez, how many people I have met who just totally discounted their dreams once they reached adulthood only to make an almighty dollar a little sooner and to live comfortably... is beyond me! What is comfort without joy? Love? Passion? Zest? Energy? God??? Nothing, if you ask me.

Of course there are the worries... the almighty worries. You know, those things that control our lives. They walk hand in hand with fears... and I hate them. You know what I am talking about, the 'what if's!' The 'I can'ts!' The 'oh man I am sure there is somebody better out there so I might as well not even try!'

Then there are those who forgot altogether what life was like outside of the tiny little box they have put themselves in. That box that just kept getting smaller and smaller until the littlest things, like going for a walk, now seem like too hard of labor for them. They are much more comfortable sitting inside and watching other people do things on a 40 inch flat screen television. These (I don't know how many million) people have driven me nuts too! I can't get their attention for a simple, nice, person-to-person conversation if I try! (Well, I can, but I would much rather see them get up and walk away from that colorful screen of nothingness, realizing that there is so much more they could be doing with their time! Gosh, life is too precious for this, people! America is, and always will be... what we make of it.

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I am going to end this blog with a story of when Megan and I went to Barbados in the southern Caribbean for the last part of our month of adventures on our Jetblue 'All You Can Jet' pass. I saw and spoke with many natives. I stayed with a native, played tennis with a native, and constantly hung out with the natives. I noticed all sorts of things that opened my eyes to the crap that goes on in the U.S. that I just had to write about it. People there do not have nearly as much as people here do in terms of material wealth. But, they do have a beautiful place to live in and an environment where people are united in their love and respect for one another. All the little things that seem to bug Americans and make them so difficult to continuously get along with roll right off these peoples' backs like rain off a leaf. They work less... but get more done, because they think clearly and with zest and energy and they work together! They take the time to engage in fun conversations with one another... gosh I miss that already! They don't worry so much about what tomorrow will bring, but instead have so much energy and liveliness and focus on the moment they are in at any given moment in time. This is all true! I saw it! I saw it in Ireland last year too. Go and see for yourself if you don't believe me! Oh yes, they take care of each other like you only see very rarely in America today, where the focus seems to be mostly on one's self. Ok, they do have their problems, but they do know how to enjoy life.

One night there was a group of taxicab drivers and friends hanging out playing dominoes at the local taxi stop in Holetown, Barbados. It was about 9pm on a Tuesday night and these guys were just laughing it up, filling the night air with the wonderful sound of laughter. Megan and I heard and walked up to see what was going on. They looked at us, some with smiles, others with a bit of confusion... maybe that two white tourists would even care what they were doing, and others couldn't care less that we came up. We talked for a minute with a few of them and they asked if we wanted to join their game. We had no change at the time, otherwise, I might have. But anyway, the point is, these grown men were outside, laughing and having fun with friends. This is something I very rarely see, if ever, today in America. So many people have an agenda, a chip on their shoulder, or maybe ten paranoid worries constantly going through their mind while in public that they are unable to engage in and enjoy times like these.

I wish these things would change... I believe they can. I can't afford to believe otherwise.

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Travel Chronicles:

September 7 - 9th: NYC - Couchsurfed with Nat Chua - Went to U.S. Open

9 - 13th: Boston - Stayed with Megan's college hockey friend Rachel Przybylowski - played tennis with someone I met in a CVS Pharmacy - played my pipes in an Irish Pub in South Boston on stage with an Irish Band.

Late 13 - early 15th: Pit Stop @ home in ATL via flight to Charlotte - Ran errands, worked a day teaching at the club - received some important items in the mail, including my newest attack, the Uilleann Pipes

15 - 21st: Long Beach, CA - Couchsurfed with Sharon Hammer - Played in Pro Futures Tourney in Costa Mesa - Rented a Smart Car Convertible for the time - Ate dinner with friends I met in '07 when I crashed their party - swam in the Pacific - broke my pipes in the same place as '07, out in front of the same house, literally in the same place on the pipes - met a new friend at the tournament - read all about the uilleann pipes - made friends with other couchsurfers staying at Sharon's too

21 - 22nd: Las Vegas - Stayed with Megan's cousins - off-roaded in their Rhino

22 - 29th: Prescott, AZ - brother Luke picked us up in LV and traveled over Hoover Dam to Prescott - met up with my bagpiper/tennis & racquetball playing friend Sandy Massie - watched a multiple-type bagpiping concert - played racquetball nearly every morning around 7 - dinner at Massies - Thumb Butte Hike w/Megan - traveled on foot and bike most of the time - gave Megan two tennis lessons - camped and slid at Sliding Rock in Sedona w/ Megan, Luke & niece Sierra

30 - 6th: Barbados, South Caribbeann - Couchsurfed with Alison Johnson (no link available) - amazing place/views - relaxed - swam in Caribbean - rented motor scooter for 3 days - went on a Sunday Group hike - ate at Fish Fry Friday night - met other couchsurfer who is married to a local tennis pro - played tennis with him - toured much of Barbados (not east coast though) - drank Barbados' own Mount Gay Rum - hitchhiked - enjoyed the simple life

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Signing off,

~ Nate