The Crazy Train - Part III

It's amazing Neil is still alive

Day 4: Almost to Indianapolis

Okay, so I messed the story up a bit for Day 4. We were in Illinois or Indiana actually, when the whole thing happened with Kim in the back. You see, we made it through Kansas and Missouri in Day 4. Yeah, and we actually even stopped in Saint Louis to see my tour buddy Lance and his older brother Bob and catch dinner with Lance (Bob had to go teach a lesson) at the Saint Louis Bread Co (known as Panera Bread all other places.) So Lance and I got to relax and have some dinner and catch up on each other's crazy adventures. Lance had just gotten back from traveling around the world on the tour for 12 weeks straight. He had been everywhere from India to Finland, to Italy, among other places, while collecting some good points and bringing his ranking down to 900 or so in the World, a career high for Lance.

So anyway, after catching up with Lance while the crew went elsewhere to eat, it was time to hit the road again. (They weren't into the trendy atmosphere here, so they all went to A&W to eat, except for Neil. Neil hung out with us.) So it was somewhere between St. Louis and Indianapolis that Kim got sick, where the story left off at the gas station in Part II.
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So here I am, coming out of the gas station only to see Tony standing outside the passenger side of the van a couple inches from Neil, who was half-way out the window staring intently into Tony's eyes, Tony's finger in Neil's face. I had to break it up. "Wo, guys come on, not now. Come on Tony!" Tony looked over at me, understanding immediately where I was coming from and walked away. That is when I asked Neil what happened - bad move. I don't even remember all the junk he told me, but it was junk. This is when I turned and apologized to Cody & Kim for such a ridiculous argument to occur at such a time when Kim was in this condition. Cody basically had his head down in a sort of sick, disgusted manner. He walked past me and on to Neil while he mumbled in a soft voice, head down, "I haven't said anything to Neil this entire trip." Oh boy, what was he gonna do to him, I thought. He walked right up to Neil and repeated the same thing he just said to me, still in a soft voice, along with "if any of you say anything else I'm gonna cut your heart out."
Oh gosh - I chimed in with, "Sounds good to me, whatta ya say Neil? Sound good?" Cody said nothing else, just walked away back to Kim, who had just went inside to purchase a gallon of water for Neil, who didn't even want to take it. "Take it Neil!" I said. He did and didn't know what to say by that time.

I comforted Kim & Cody by telling them we were only a couple of hours away from Indy. So, we all packed it in one last time before Indy and, well, drove to Indy. We met Kim's cousin there in Indy, helped them get all there stuff out and into her car, played a few farewell bagpipe tunes for them, had them sign my van guestbook (yeah, I have a guestbook,) got some gas, and we (Tony, Neil, & I) were on our way.

It is about midnight now. Columbus, Ohio is about three hours away. Tony, Neil, and I all agreed that we should go the distance to Columbus. That is exactly what we did. I drove about an hour, then passed the keys on to Tony. Yes, Neil was still in the front seat. While Tony was driving Neil decided he wanted to get up and brew some tea for himself. Tony didn't like this at all, as Tony figured if Neil was so attimate about not doing anything illegal, then he was playing games. "Sit down Neil," Tony said in a demanding voice. Neil refused. Tony snapped at Neil... again. There happened to be a rest stop up the road and Tony agressively pulled off into a spot and really laid into Neil again for the last time, explaining to me that Neil refuses to give up his seat, but stands up to cook. "You see Nate, I'm tired of these (blank) games." At this point I just wanted to sleep. "I see. Neil, just sit down so he can drive." "It's not fair Nathan." "Just do it. Do it." Tony chimed in, "If you don't sit the (blank) down I'm gonna leave you here at this (blank) rest stop Neil!" Neil finally sat down. "Was that so (blank) hard?!" Tony finished... and we were on the road again. One big ugly family Columbus bound!

Tony handed me back the keys after about an hour of driving and I took us the rest of the way in. We got in around 3am (midnight San Diego time) and stayed the night at Milo.

Day 5: Big Day

Today we are to take the van to my hometown of Groveport, Ohio, about 20 minutes from Columbus, and switch vehicles with my '87 Bimmer Convertible. We first got some brunch with my Dad at the Linden Cafe.

It was a time filled with good conversation and good food - thanks Dad. My Dad went back to work and we headed on to Groveport, to the place of my begets, to switch vehicles. My Mom was home - I didn't even realize it was Saturday! I thought she would be at work. So I got to surprise my Mom for the (???) time and see her before we left, and she got to meet the last of the crew. After a lot of packing everybody's stuff into the Bimmer, we then used the roof bag from the van and Tony strapped it over the trunk in the back of my car, in such a way that we had to keep the top down the entire time. Keep in mind it is the hottest day I ever remember in October in Ohio (low 90's!) so it wouldn't be such a bad thing. By now it was about 3pm and we were on our way. Tony was in the back right with his dog on his lap and Neil was in front, as usual. It was supposed to be about a 7 1/2 hour drive to Fredericksburg, Virginia, where I was to drop off Tony. Yet you know how we like to make stops. It was actually a pretty fun ride - we all got along good, singing to the music, acting like the crazies we were to the Homecoming night high schoolers at the Maryland gas station we stopped at, and just having a good time.

The circumstances may seem rough from an outsider's perspective, but this was actually the smoothest ride we'd all had in what seemed like forever. Not only this, but we were all feeling the excitement of being almost there. The air seemed fresher than ever, the greens looked greener than ever, and life was just sweet. To make a long story short (something I need to get better at!) we arrived in Fredericksburg around 1:30am. The original plan was for me to drop Tony off at this big hall (can't remember the name) where his sister likes to hang out and surprise them with my bagpipes. We had a great elaborate scheme planned, yet when we got to this hall, well, only about three cars were in the entire lot and... it was closed. It was a bit late. The number Tony had for his sister was not working, and I guess Tony had never been able to get a hold of anybody in his family the entire way. At this point I should have been sad for Tony, but instead I couldn't stop laughing. The whole thing just looked hilarious at this point in time at this time of night. Picture it - Tony is trying to knock on the door of this huge meeting hall at nearly 2am, it's freaking cold outside, I've got my top down, loads of crap, Tony's dog... and Neil. So anyway, we went back to the gas station and looked in the local phone book for Tony's sister. We found her, tried calling, "This number is no longer in service..." explained the nice operator recording. Oh boy, well, the last option was to go to the house listed in the phone book and have Tony knock on the door... it's pushing 2:30am by the time we found it (an older fellow at another gas station lead us the way to the street she lived off of... very nice.) So there we were, at this house in the countryside of northeast Virginia in the middle of the night (yes, there were cars in the driveway.) Tony got out with his dog and knocked... and knocked... and knocked some more. No luck. Time to get a hotel room. We got a room by about 3:30am and Neil elected to sleep in the car. Neil was at this point trying to convince me that Tony was a bum and was just using me. I refused to believe him. "Goodnight Neil." It was a great sleep.

Day 6: Final Destination approaching...

We got up, took showers, and went back to the house from the night before to knock again. Tony knocked again... the door cracked open, Tony stuck his head in and said, "What are you doing? Let me in woman!" "Oh my God!" she said, "Tony!" Yes, it was his sister. I think my heart jumped higher than Tony's. His Mom was there. I got to meet them both and they brewed me some coffee while Tony told them a bit of our adventures. I really wanted to play my pipes for Tony, but Neil was whining like a baby at that point for us to get out of there, so I told Tony. He understood, though he thought it was crap... and it was, but it was what it was. Tony gave me his part and told me he would pay me for the hotel bill as soon as he got his first paycheck. 'How about that Neil?!' I thought. 'Not such a bum and a thief after all. I never thought he was. Glad I didn't listen to ya.'

And so it was time to take Neil home. I thought aloud as I saw a church, "Boy, it would be nice to get to go to church today. Oh well."
"You want to go to church? You can go to church if you want!" Neil said. At this point the clarity of Tony's frustration toward Neil peaked in my mind.
"Wait, you want me to go to church, but you wouldn't let me play my pipes for Tony's family for five minutes?! What's wrong with this picture? No, I'm not going to church Neil!" I exclaimed, explaining how messed up that was. Keep in mind, Neil may be small, but he is 42 years old.

So, I took Neil home to Durham, North Carolina, him being his rude self as usual. We finally arrived at his new home, an apartment in an older part of Durham. I took his bags in, shook his hand, and said a very thankful goodbye and I was on my way.

Aaaaahhhhh, freedom. Thank you Lord! Charlotte, here I come.

It was about 8pm when I arrived at my buddy Cary's, where I am currently staying. Amazing grace how sweet the sound, I am home!

The Crazy Train:

4000 miles
$800 in gas
$700 of which was paid for by other passengers
700 pounds of luggage
100's of details I'm missing
14 states
6 Passengers
6 days
4 nights of couchsurfing
3 Dogs
3 friends made (Kumara, Tony, & Kim the Couchsurfer)
2 acquaintances made (Cody & Kim)
1 manipulative midget
1 automobile exchange
1 wheel fell off
1 night in a hotel
0 items stolen
0 deaths
0 times a dog pooped or peed in the van
0 times a dog attacked Neil
0 times Tony's dog barked... the entire journey (I wouldn't mind having a dog like this)
0 alcoholic drinks consumed by passengers other than me
0 more details I'm gonna write

All made it safely to our destinations.

And that concludes the story of the Crazy Train Trek Across America.

Signing off...

~ Nate